CHEF has a sense of humor


I found Kinky Bizzle.

Good one. But that’s not kinkyb!tch’s ride. Her guy makes like $7 an hour, he’s not going to be buying her a Mercedes anytime soon, even if it is that shitty SUV they make. And watching Britney videos and playing video games doesn’t exactly net a huge salary, so there’s no way she’s buying anything more than what the $25 weekly allowance she gets will buy. But thanks for thinking of the site, CHEF.

Kinkyb!tch, the “homemaker”

I knew there was a reason all the other reindeer didn’t like him. I tried to make cookies that resembled him for tomorrow’s festivities and this is the best I could do. They didn’t look that hard(magazine’s sample is the top, in case anyone couldn’t tell), but all they did was give me shit from the get go. Now I know why there is always only a pic of 3 or 4 cookies in all those layouts–they are impossible to make!

Wow, I can see why the Warden keeps you around. Pretty creative. A handicapped Rudolph, never heard of him.

Cupcake Pebbles suck

Being the humanitarian that I am (rescuing dogs, entertaining online friends for free, letting chicks know when their husband’s ask for my number), I thought I would add one more service to the list, letting the world know which cereal to steer clear from. Post has blessed us with many a tasty cereals, Golden Crisp, Honey Bunches of Oats, Fruity and Cocoa Pebbles to name a few. Hell, they even taught America’s children their ABCs with Alpha-Bits. They’ve been good to us, no doubt, but they failed with Cupcake Pebbles.

I know what you are thinking, this looks as good to eat as Kbeezy does, how can it be bad? We all know looks can be deceiving though (unless you are looking at me, that sweetness is legit), so don’t be fooled. My complaints with this cereal include, but are not limited to,
-getting soft faster than CBTs dick after being told that 18 and under night was yesterday, not tonight
-not looking pretty in the bowl, a la Fruity Pebbles
-elevating my blood glucose levels higher than fat, Type 2 diabetic Drew’s
-making me more insane than Lindsay (just kidding linds 😉 ) after discovering there was no tub of frosting in the box (as the aroma of the cereal indicated)
-Vitamin D content not living up to what Cocoa Pebbles provides in one serving
-leaving my mouth with a cake batter type of after taste (the batter jokes need not be mentioned, you all know my standards)
Overall, Cupcake Pebbles is for the birds. Don’t let it’s low price or fancy box fool you, this is generic Rice Krispie cereal (sans 3 tablespoons of sugar you used to add when you mom wasn’t looking) all over again. Stick with the original and give Cocoa a try, that “once you go black you don’t go back” does not apply in this scenario. This concludes kbeezy’s PSA for 2/25/10.

“I know what you are thinking.”

Probably not, but I’ll let you know what I am thinking. I’m thinking this is the best and most important post in the history of this site. Probably the whole internet for that matter. Thanks for the review kinkyb!tch.